Things Change As Time Passes

So it's been a really long time since I last wrote and a lot has changed.

As a theatre major I basically have to take classes in every area (directing, stagecraft, acting, costume design, and theatre history). When I switched to being a theatre major my full intent was to be an actress and perform on Broadway. I still hope to do this but within the past few months I have discovered that I much more enjoy working in the costume shop and spending my time behind the scenes and backstage helping the actors get ready.

A friend in my acting class helped me get into the GVSU mainstage show Rhinoceros and I was able to help with the costumes during tech week and the performances. My main job was to paint one of the actors green and gray before his scene and then during his scene add more paint to his hands and face as well as put on horns that would get bigger and bigger. I had a blast helping this actor as well as many of the other actors in the show. I also got to sew a few things for the show (like tablecloths and torn clothes) and get to know the head costume ladies and their shop. I will hopefully get to work in the costume shop next year for pay which will be the best job ever. To sew and get paid for it is the best job I can think of.

It is that latter sentence that makes me feel like I belong in costume design/construction. Acting was a desire and I'd still like to be on Broadway some day but sewing is my passion. Sewing is one of those things that de-stresses me and if I could sew every day of my life, I think that would be amazing.

Slow Going

So things have been pretty uneventful since my last post.
I auditioned for quite a few shows here on the GVSU campus including RENT and Into the Woods. For RENT I was called back for the ensemble but to be a part of the production meant quitting my job and losing $200 every two weeks. It just wasn't the right thing to do at this time in my life. I need the money. Into the Woods was auditioning but since it was based in the Opera theatre I was a little bit out of my league and didn't get called back. During both of these audtions, RENT and Into the Woods, I was struggling with the sore throat troubles I mention below.
I have also auditioned for a Shakespeare Company based in Grand Rapids, as they were casting for Pericles. Even though I was not cast, I have been asked to audition again for their production of Hamlet next year and be a part of their small company that performs at small random venues like Barnes and Noble.

Life has been rather frustrating for me lately. I have been very sick with some type of sinus or nasal illness and can't seem to get it to go away. It has caused a lot of trouble for my voice. There are days where singing is almost impossible. There are other days where I am surprised by the clarity of my voice. I am taking a class this semester called voice for Non-music majors. Many of our assignments require singing and we even perform in class. I can't say how many times I've had to ask for a few days off for vocal rest, too afraid to sing with my voice in the condition it is in that day. I'm afraid to sing. That's really depressing me. I am even more depressed when I try singing and the sound that comes out is unfamiliar and not good.

So basically the last few months have been slow and depressing. If my voice doesn't clear up soon I'll be searching desperately to find every possible solution besides the doctor, since she didn't help any when I saw her in September. I'll just have to be really careful, take things slowly, and hope that I can get my voice back to tip-top health. My career depends on it.

Now a Theatre Major

So I decided to switch my major to Theatre. After my acting class last semester and the small one act play that I was in, I officially have stage fever. I just want to be on stage all of the time and be performing. I've been singing as much as possible lately, focusing on having my own style to songs but keeping it true to the original especially with the Wicked songs. I want to keep true to Elphaba's character but I don't want people to think I am copying Idina.
I signed up for all of my classes for next year and got into Acting II as well as many of the other now required courses. Thankfully I was able to salvage my English courses into an english minor and if I plan it all right I may be able to graduate a semester earlier than I had planned with maybe one summer of classes.
Mom isn't too happy about my switch to theatre. She's afraid that I won't find a job in acting and struggle to make ends meet. I know its going to be difficult but I'm willing to try at least. If I can't find a job then I'll figure something out then. I wish I could give her a reassuring response but I don't really know if I will be successful in the highly competitive acting arena... I just really hope I am.
I am also really excited because Grand Valley plans to perform RENT this next Fall. Auditions are in September and I can't wait. I'm new to the theatre arena at GVSU but I hope that I can get a good part.
Super excited about this next school year. I can't wait to see what it brings.

Idina is Pregnant!

The other day I was on a cleaning spree when I got a text message from my boyfriend. It read "Idina is pregnant" and that was that. My heart skipped a beat but I insisted on searching for it on the internet. I found so many sites exclaiming that Idina and Taye are expecting their first child. AHHHHH!!! I squealed so loud, startling my roommates and friends who were in the room.
This is just so great! Ever since I started looking up to Idina I had always hoped that Taye and Idina would be able to have a family and such. I knew that they both had busy careers but I held out hope. Now its for real. They're having a baby and its so exciting! I'm so happy for them and I'm hoping that every thing goes well for her. I'll be thinking about her, Taye, and their baby every day. :)

New Year/New Semester

It's been a while since I've written but things have been pretty uneventful since Idina's concert in November. I am happy to say that I am taking Acting 1 at GVSU this semester and that it has been great so far. The class involves quite a bit of improv but we are scheduled to do a few monologues and scene acting throughout the semester which I am greatly looking forward to. I'm also planning to work in the costume department for class credit. Hopefully I'll be able to audition for a few of the plays/musicals as well, with the information I receive from my professor, my only connection to the acting department.
Since the New Year I have also started a caffeine free diet in hopes of strengthening my voice and making it healthier. I read online that caffeine affects your voice so I am determined to test it on my own. So far I'm just feeling really tired without the boost of caffeine but I do hear a slight change in my voice since I've gone off the caffeine. We'll see how things turn out.

Stage Nerves - A Fiction Piece for WRT 219

For my Creative Writing class we had to write a fiction piece about a ticking clock and something suspenseful. For the life of me I could not figure out what to write about until about 2 hrs before my class would start. I figured that I could be the character and that the suspense could be the clock ticking on the day of my first performance in Wicked which has yet to come and is thus fiction. I wrote this in about an hour or so and I'm actually really happy with how it turned out. I hope you like it. ENJOY!

Stage Nerves

The show time clock slowly ticks down and blinks red when the time lands on 7:00:00. Wardrobe, make-up, quick run throughs and voice warm-ups had taken hours but I’d been preoccupied during those times and hadn’t had the time to really dwell on the magnitude of the event that was taking place that night. Now I stand perched at the curtain, waiting nervously, impatiently, and excitedly, my mind whirling with thoughts in all forms of emotions. Waiting for the lines that signal my entrance onto the stage, I fidget nervously with the suitcase in my hand and the glasses placed on my nose.

My colleague sings beautifully, opening the performance with her melodic, operatic voice and her smiling grace and charm. She’d given me a hug and smiled big at me, reminding me that I was going to do great and that she’d be there with me throughout the whole thing. I’d smiled back pushing away the urge to cry from all of the emotions building up for fear of ruining the perfectly completed make-up on my face. Her being there with me the whole time is mostly true; she’d be on stage alongside me for much of the performance, but all I can think about are the many times where I will be alone. I can hear all that is going on but I am unable to steal a peak at the happenings on stage.

I look to the show time clock which has continued past its red 7:00:00 and ticks slowly counting each second, every single one. It captures me in its incandescent way and for an instant it is all I can think about. Quickly I remove my eyes from the mesmerizing form and focus again on the speaking of the performers on stage. They have moved past the first musical interlude and hurry into the meat of the background storyline, setting the stage for the leap back in time. That’s one of my favorite attributes of this production: the beginning is the present in the character’s terms and then it jumps to the distant past, then back to present, and then to a nearer past. The audience gets a background story to better understand the happenings of the nearer past and the present.

A word reaches my ear and I jump, afraid I missed my cue. I listen carefully and realize that it is only a similar line. Cautiously I look to the clock. After watching the clock during rehearsals I’d calculated that my entrance comes approximately nine minutes into the show. The digital clock shows 7:06:45, so I am able to relax a bit, trying to focus again on the speaking of my colleagues. Sigh, I actually have some time to try to get rid of my nerves. From as far back as I can remember I have never gotten nervous before going on stage. I have always found it so exciting that the idea of being nervous was pushed away. But now, even with the knowing that this will probably be one of the best moments of my life, I can’t seem to remove the nervousness that causes my heart to race and my stomach to churn. What if I miss a line? What if I forget the words to a song? What if I forget a prop or… The “what ifs” continue as I absent-mindedly stroke the inexistent wrinkles in my dark blue costume, straightening the already perfectly placed glasses once again.

Some of the crew members rush around preparing to bring back the piece that they’d reeled out moments ago. I move aside carefully, not wanting to be in the way, but too nervous to really think of where I’m going. My bones jump when I bump into something that catches me. Looking back slowly I realize it is my other colleague, my love interest in the production.

“Whoa there,” he whispers, holding my arms tightly as he makes sure I’m steady. “You wouldn’t want to knock yourself out before your first performance.”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” I whisper back, straightening my dress again and patting the cap on my head of black hair. He takes my hand, stopping my random antics and touches my cheek with his other one, causing my eyes to finally meet his face. I smile graciously at him, knowing what he’s about to say before he says it.

“Not a problem. Just take a deep breath and relax. You’re going to do great!” He smiles at me and then hurries off to get ready for his later appearance in the show.

I fix my off-kilter glasses, looking again at the luminous show time clock. The time ticks approaching 7:08:30. Panicked, I listen for the lines and discover my entrance is seconds away. My nervous motions and bumping had caused time to fly by and here I was seconds away from the night I had been preparing for for so long. The sheer magnitude of what was about to take place nearly overwhelmed me but the excitement and joy that I was doing something I had waited so long for beat out the nervousness and a smile etched its way across my face. My suitcase tightly in hand I wait as the doors open that allow me to run onto the stage full of enthusiasm. Though my heart is still racing, the butterflies in my stomach have disappeared and the thoughts of failure wiped from my mind.

The stage clock shows 7:09:15 and I smile even more, suppressing a laugh at the hilariousness of my time guessing. My colleague speaks the words “When we were both very young.” That’s my cue. I straighten my cap once again and hurry through the doors and onto the stage, smiling at the audience in front of me. Applause resounds through the theatre and I can feel the wetness at the corner of my eyelids. I look down at my hands to make sure that I am really there and that this is all really happening. Secretly I pinch my green-skinned hand and look up at the performers entering the stage for the next scene. This is real, this is happening, it isn’t a dream anymore. I am Elphaba on Broadway. WICKED!

Idina Menzel Called Me Gorgeous!

Oh my gosh!! So I have finally settled down enough to actually write about Idina's concert. Wednesday night I could barely speak a complete sentence let alone sit still for more than a minute, so writing my blog or in my journal was not possible. My mind has been able to process all that happened so hopefully I get it all down. Prepare for this to be long. :)
As soon as we drove onto the MSU campus, on our way to church dinner, my heart started racing and my excitement grew, evident by my random squeals and giggles. Mercy and family didn't quite understand my excitement during dinner, but Grace and mom shared the anticipation Christie and I were feeling. Time would not move fast enough.
Once at the Wharton Center, Chris and I waited patiently, unlike some others, for the doors to open. I asked around hoping that I could find some way to meet Idina, but everyone I asked told me that she was doing private meet and greets only. My heart sunk at this and my hope began to disappear. Christie continued encouraging me and telling me that I still had a chance to meet Idina. And even if I didn't get to meet her I was at least going to be in the same room as her, seeing her in person and hearing her voice.
We were finally allowed in around 7:30 when the show was planned to start. I expected to see Idina any minute. Nope. Some guys came out and sang songs for nearly a half hour. Chris and I were seriously antsy and getting a little annoyed at the unexpected delay of Idina's appearance. When he finally finished we waited almost 45 minutes in a weird intermission period, unsure of when Idina would appear. Finally at almost 9:00 Idina finally appeared. I broke down right when I saw her. Everyone around me was clapping and yelling, but I was sobbing tears of joy, so overwhelmed to see her there in front of me. Christie cried a little as she reminded me to look up at Idina since my crying was causing me to close my eyes. It was unbelievable.
She began singing and I continued crying until well into her second song. For the rest of the concert I just smiled, the smile never leaving my face and my eyes concentrated on Idina. She would blow kisses to the audience and I'd blow kisses back. She was everything I expected and so much more. Her personality and excitement blew me away. Whatever emotion I felt for her grew more as I was able to see her personality and the way she acted while on stage. She's more my role model now than before the concert; she's so great!
Here's as good a list I can make of what she sang: Brave, I Stand, Gorgeous, My Own Worst Enemy, There's Only Us (Rent), For Good (Wicked), a Hebrew prayer dedicated to her sister, a wedding song I didn't know, and one other song that I can't remember the title of.
She was so energetic on stage and during many songs was walking all around and even laying on the floor for one. Her presence and grace never ceased to amaze me. She left and I was sure she was done but the clapping and yelling of the crowd brought her back for an encore. "Something has changed within me..." she began and the whole crowd screamed. Defying Gravity was her encore piece and everyone loved it. When she had left for sure, my happiness began to fade, she was gone and my time with her didn't feel like enough.
Christie and I hurried up the stairs and then down the stairs to the main lobby. We rushed, running through the parking ramp, to the backstage door. Only a small crowd had gathered by the time we got down there and it grew behind us quickly. We waited for about 30 minutes before Idina's tour manager came out. She said that Idina was tired and that she would do autographs but that she (the manager) would prefer no personal, posing pictures because that was too time consuming and Idina was not a fan of candids so don't take random pictures of her autographing. We lined up and continued waiting. Christie was already 45 minutes late for work so mom took her, leaving me there. I was sad that Chris couldn't stay and be there when Idina came out.
After another 30 minutes or so Idina appeared, my role model. She came down the stairs and started signing. I held my spot and she got to me, signing this journal and my CD cover of her music. I searched for something to say, hoping I would speak clearly and not say something stupid. "You're my role model," I said to her, forcing back my tears of excitement. "Thank you," she said as she looked up at me, finished with the autographs. "Aww... you're gorgeous." I was stunned. Idina Menzel, my role model, called ME gorgeous! "Thank you, so are you," I said, giving her a quick hug. It felt like I was hugging a friend, not a tony award winning broadway star. I was the first person she hugged and the first that she really talked to. I walked a few feet away before breaking down in happy tears. I hurried to the car and jumped in, crying heavily while showing mom my autographs and telling her all that had happened.
This whole experience was so unreal and I wish I could live it over and over again. I wish that my time with Idina had been a little bit longer and that I could have at least one picture of her and me or even a video of my meeting her. It was so great! I have a new swing in my step now and a new hope for things to come in the future. I hope that I have another chance to see Idina and hopefully I'll be able to get a picture with her. But right now I'm happy to have all of the memories of November 5th, 2008 and the autographs that she signed. I'll never ever forget that day!